Ever since Nelly scored what seemed like a comeback hit with country singer Tim McGraw in 2004 with “Over and Over,” hip-hop has been trying to figure out a way to mesh country music into it without losing its credibility. That hasn’t worked out as well as the artists leading the charge would’ve hoped. Snoop Dogg‘s song with Willie Nelson was laughed off as a corny bluegrass mashup about Snoop’s favorite subject–smoking weed. Now, LL Cool J is tossing his hat into the hip-hop/country song mashup ring with country crooner Brad Paisley on their song “Accidental Racist.”
Brad Paisley and LL Cool J spend an entire five minutes and fifty seconds trying to convince the opposite race that they aren’t racist despite doing racist things. For example, Paisley sings about not realizing putting on a t-shirt emblazoned with a Confederate flag was racist because he only meant it as a tribute to southern country rock band Lynard Skynard. While that’s all fine and good for Paisley to be out here doing, LL Cool J knows better.
Being that I am the snarky individual I am, I’ve taken a few excerpts of LL’s lyrics to explain to him why he shouldn’t have said that on a track about being “accidentally” racist. By the way, how the hell can you be accidentally racist?!
1. “If you don’t judge my du-rag, I won’t judge your red flag”
Maybe it’s me, but comparing a du-rag to a confederate flag is hella dumb. One is a cap that gets brothas those 360-degree waves they spend countless hours brushing their hair to get while the other is a symbol of oppression and segregation during a moment in our country’s history when minorities had to constantly look over their shoulders. Hardly the same thing.
2. “RIP Robert E. Lee but I’ve gotta thank Abraham Lincoln for freeing me, know what I mean”
I understand we’re all people and we shouldn’t speak ill of the dead, but I’ll be damned if I ever send an “RIP Robert E. Lee” anything out into the world. Forgive me for not being sympathetic to Lee’s death, but did I mention that Lee wanted to use slaves as cheap labor in order to end capitalism? Yeah, I’m all the way good with him. Though I’m not down with Robert E. Lee, doesn’t mean I’m totally #TeamLincoln. As much as people want to say otherwise, he only freed the slaves so he would have more people to help him keep capitalism alive. But I’m sleep.
3. “Just because my pants are saggin’ doesn’t mean I’m up to no good”
It doesn’t mean you’re up to no good because your pants are sagging, but it does mean you want your exit only chocolate chute penetrated by some overpowering thug dude in prison named Tiny. Don’t believe me, sag your pants in front of a dude who’s just been set free. It’s not called the slammer for nothing!
4. “The past is the past, you feel me, let bygones be bygones”
LL is right. The past is the past. However, when the past is still affecting us today, it’s kind of hard to allow yourself to let bygones be bygones.
