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Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston may no longer have been a couple when she died in February, but as he told TODAY’s Matt Lauer in an interview that aired Wednesday morning — his first interview since her death — he still misses her fiercely.

“Our relationship was great,” he said. “I had 14 beautiful, beautiful years with that woman.” And it’s not just his revisionist history, he insisted: “I can honestly say that — I love that woman with — with everything that I am. And I believe she loved me the same way.”

Still, Whitney and Bobby’s relationship was, almost from the start, filled with conflict of one kind or the other. Brown says he never used hard drugs before meeting Houston, and said that she had used drugs before they were involved. “I worried about it when … we first got together until I tried it,” he said. “And when I tried it, for some reason, I have an addictive personality.”

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