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Ever since Kanye Tweeted that “H.A.M” would be the first single from he and Jay-Z’s collaborative album, Watch The Throne, fans have been scratching their heads trying to figure out what it means.

Besides the obvious affront to Muslims, Jews and other non-swine eaters it’s just outright confusing. But we are going to put our thinking caps on and aluminum foil hats to try and divine some meaning from this cryptic acronym.

HAM in the Bible

In Genesis Ham is the youngest son of Noah, who sees his father strip to his loin cloth during a drunken bender. It also means “hot” in Hebrew. Noah built an Ark to prepare for a flood of water but they are also going to bring the heat at the same time.

That means things are about to boil and the boiling point for water is 100 degrees celsius. 100 C is an obvious allusion to the hundred dollar bill or “C-Note” with Benjamin Franklin’s face, who was an amateur musician from Philly. So this a subliminal diss to Beanie Sigel, Philly’s son of Ham who has obviously been cursed.

Going Greek

Heta, Alpha and Mu are the 7th, 1st and 12th letters in the Greek Alphabet. 7112. This is a coded message about the end of the world coming on July 1, 2012. At least that’s what THIS GUY SAYS. Get your water bottles and beef jerky ready!

Plug (Car) Toonin

In the animated television series The Life and Times Of Juniper Lee H.A.M is a secret society called, Humans Against Magic. They are well-versed in the ways of magic and have developed technology that allow them to battle magical creatures. They also wear crystals that let them see through the magic barrier. Their leader Lex once wanted to study and learn magic, until there was an accident that gave him the scared face he has now and caused him to dedicate his life to destroying magic. Producer Lex Luger  is rumored to be making the beat for H.A.M.

“Holla At Me”

This would be pretty close to being true if this were 1998. However, “Hola Hovito” was a track off The Blueprint and the more obvious interpretation would be “Holy” at me, Holla rhyming with “Allah”. Basically, pray to them.

“H.A.M” is short for Hammer

So look out for Jay-Z’s subliminal retort to “Better Run Run” called “Half-A-Millie.” Also, if you fold the album artwork in half it looks like two guys in Ed Hardy krumping in the rain.

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